Breakfast in Elkhart

I rarely eat breakfast. In Fact, the very idea of breakfast disgusts me. I vomit a little in my mouth when I see a pile of pancakes at 8 in the morning. That being said, when I visit the old folks, I seem to love breakfast. My father stares at me, mouth agape, as he watches me steam potatoes, soak wheat berries, trim parsley, and coddle eggs. "Why don't you go to culinary school?" He asks. ""Why don't you go to hell?" I reply...well, not really, you see I do care, I really do care about the old folks. The truth is, I simply ignore him. Anyway, here is the latest breakfast creation to come from my last visit home:



I start by sauteeing an onion in olive oil until the chopped bits are translucent.
Next, I add chopped green chilies, chopped eggplant, and chopped tomato, and chopped bacon!
Cook these until the eggplant is done.
Then I add four eggs on top of the mixture, turning the heat down way low as I do.
I cover the pan with a lid (or another pan of the same diameter).
When the eggs are done, I add some fresh basil and some shredded cheese.
Oh, did I forget about the tabbouleh? Hell the fuck no I didn't!
I took wheat berries that I had soaked overnight and cooked, cooled and rinsed, and I added some fresh parsley, mint, onion, and the juice of two oranges (hey were out of lemons). Yumsville!

The new back room at the Vid

It's all too clean. Much too clean.

The good Doctor has gone back to his roots this week, reviewing some of the crappy comics he grew up with. I'll start you off mild today:

Jughead Jones in "The World of Jughead"

On to page 1!

Oh boy! Posters of Shatner, Nimoy, AND Barbara Eden! They'll mesh in perfectly with my stills of Lassie and Englebert Humperdinck.


Here we have Miss Grundy and Principle Weatherbee discussing the recent change in Jughead attitude. Jughead seems to have two pairs of eyebrows, and where the hell is his beanie?


Here we see the relationship between Jesus and Principle Weatherbee. Just look at that halo in Panel 4.


The "Bee" askes Archie to spy on his pal Jughead. Reggie provides us with much needed comic relief. Unfortunately there is no Moose present to beat the crap out of Reggie.


Jughead proves his insanity. Fortunately, he still has his appetite...for human flesh!!!


The circus is coming to Riverdale! Well, not really, the writer thought it would be funny, and it is, like crutches.


The good news is that we get to see Reggie get horribly injured after all, and he takes down a Swede as well. Good work Jughead! The "Bee" almost breaks the fourth wall with his final comment.

I have reams of this crap. I think I'll do a "Betty and Veronica" next...

Garden thieves!

I know I have had more than one ripe tomato in the past two weeks. I can't pinpoint it, but I theorize a garden thief. I'm tempted to camp out all day at the garden with a good book and a case of Bitburger so that I may catch the thief. I have my suspects (f-11 watch out!) and will act accordingly. Just an hour ago I purchased four fifty pound bags of rock salt. When I find the culprit, I will be the Rome to their Carthage. Let's see your heirloom tomatoes grow in super-saline soil sucker! The bad part is that I will be out of town for the next five days, and I have no one to water the garden for me in the interem. I think if I soak them heavily tomorrow, they will make it for five days. I have faith in my charges.

Comics!

Well, I have a good friend who has, literally, inherited several hundred rare and valuable comics and comix. I had the pleasure to stroke and peruse saome of the vast stash of nerd masturbatory material. Oh was it grand. I am still smarting from the meeting of the plastic enclosed pages. Come, see what impulses the power of Dr. Crowbar!!!!!:


and:



Finally:



Ahh, by this time you might need some aloe vera for the sensitive parts.

What is the price of pure pleasure?

I think I know. Well...not really, but my spies are in the works. Oh, spies you say? Damn right, I have a network of soldier/slaves doing my bidding, oh yeah dammit. Hmmm, actually I relaxing with a martini and a beatiful spring night. Nevermind. I think I'll just grab an iced tea, mabey green.

Spending too much time hating work.

I'm having co-worker problems. The other busser does not seem to want to do his job. The problem is that I don't want to do his job either, and his work has to get done. He spends 15 minutes in the bathroom at least five times per shift. I would suspect cocaine usage, but he moves far to slow for that. Perhaps heroin? Well, I haven't found any scorched spoons yet...unless he is getting some really pure snortable shit. Hmm. Anyway, he is angering me. I don't think he should be surprised to find a knife plunging in and out of his chest. Not that I would do that, mind you, but a person's got limits. Limits.

*sigh*

It's all about stage five living when working.
Stage five.